Mentors are amazing. These people influence our lives and change our perspectives. They take the time to teach, advise, counsel, and train—what a gigantic blessing. I can think of many people throughout my life that I would consider mentors. There’s Florence, the wonderfully patient 96 year old woman who taught me how to knit, or Margueritte, one of my first bosses when I went back into the work world after years as a stay at home mom. She taught me about “rechoosing” rather than changing your mind.
Mentors & Teachers of the Digital Age
In this digital age, we are lucky enough to choose mentors from various people who share their skills and passions with thousands, sometimes even millions of people, through websites, television, books, social media, YouTube, etc.
Of course, it’s not exactly the same. I can recall Florence taking my hands as she taught me to knit. I couldn’t quite do the right thing with my hands, so she took my hands in hers and showed me what I needed to do. That level of instruction and reciprocal care is impossible in books, blogs, and videos. But there are a few that I would call mentors—people that I have never met that completely changed my perspective, not just on that particular topic, but also the way I view myself and what I am capable of accomplishing.
Mentor in the Kitchen
Barefoot Contessa ~ Ina Garten
The first time I experienced this one-sided mentorship was with the fabulous Barefoot Contessa—Ina Garten. Back in 2002, I was a newly married 20 year old who had absolutely no clue how to cook. I happened upon a new Food Network TV show where Ina’s encouraging guidance and calm voice made me feel like I could try her recipes and succeed. It worked! Every recipe I tried worked beautifully. I steadily gained confidence and no longer felt like a kitchen failure. And still, anytime I want a foolproof recipe, I know where to turn.
Mentors in the Garden
Gardener's World ~ Monty Don
Though I have enjoyed gardening for many years, Monty Don was the first gardener I regularly watched. Much like my first introduction to Barefoot Contessa years earlier, his calm manner and encouraging garden commentary made me feel like I didn’t have to be an expert and know all the garden things. I could enjoy gardening even when I made mistakes and suffered failures. If Monty Don can have a crop fail or need to move a plant because it’s not quite the right spot, well, then I can too. His graciousness and optimistic attitude encouraged me to want to not just be a better gardener but a kinder person as well.
Gardener Answer ~ Laura
I do not spend much time on social media (not usually a very useful quality for a blogger!) But one of the few YouTube channels I regularly watch is Garden Answer. Laura is very knowledgeable and experienced, and the video quality is excellent. But it’s her straightforward approach and upbeat attitude that makes you feel like you are chatting with a friend. I have learned a ton watching her channel, but more than that, I’m constantly inspired to try new things, step out of my comfort zone, and tackle projects that might have intimidated me before. I have found that my dose of gardening courage has bled into other areas of my life, and I am more willing to try new things and maybe even fail occasionally (gasp!)
Living My Best Life Mentor
Jane Brocket’s book, The Gentle Art of Domesticity was life-changing for me. About 12 years ago, I was a stay-at-home mom, loving life and with no ambitions to be something “more”.
But I often felt judged in my choice, especially by women of a certain age (cough, cough, I’m talking to you, boomers).
The judgment came in various forms ~ the disapproving look and judgmental snort the middle-aged bank manager gave me when I filled out my occupation on a loan application, the “potential” I was told I had, the countless questions of what I was going to “do” with my life, and especially the constant pressures from books, magazines, and TV telling me that to be a real woman, I had to be and do “more”, whatever that meant. I always felt defensive about my choice and had a chip on my shoulder about it. But The Gentle Art of Domesticity completely changed things for me.
In the Gentle Art of Domesticity, Jane Brocket unabashedly celebrates the creativity and inspiration she has found in the domestic arts. In the introduction of the book, she shares this slice of wisdom:
“There is a world of difference between domesticity and domestication. This book is about domesticity and the pleasures and joys of the gentle domestic arts of knitting, crochet, baking, stitching, quilting, gardening, and homemaking. It is emphatically not about the repetitive endless rounds of cleaning, washing, ironing, shopping, and house maintenance that come with domestication. Domesticity rises above the bossiness of cleaning products and media exhortations to keep our houses pristine and hygienic, and focuses instead on creativity within the domestic space.”
It was inspiring to read the thoughts of an educated and articulate woman who chose to stay home. And I appreciated that she was not ashamed to find pleasure in domesticity and “old-fashioned” skills. Her perspective helped me to let go of the defensive attitude and ignore the snide comments. I found pleasure in my choice to stay home and enjoy domestic arts, too. There are many versions of “success”, and it doesn’t have to mean money and career advancement. And who cares what other people think anyway!? That’s a most useful lesson to learn. Shedding the defensiveness that I carried around has helped me be more gracious in my perspective.
Final Thoughts
One of the glorious things about being an adult is that learning is up to me. With a dose of curiosity and a pinch of effort, I can learn new skills, get inspiration, gain confidence, and become a more well-rounded person–all without leaving my home or ever meeting the person teaching and inspiring me. Whether it’s T.V. shows, YouTube channels, blogs, or books, it’s a pretty big blessing to be able to have access to all this knowledge and resources right at our fingertips. There are countless men and women who have shared their knowledge, skills, and perspectives, and I am very grateful for their willingness to share. Do you have any mentors you’ve never met that have changed your perspective or life in some way?
